Do I have an issue with peoples perceptions of being married to a Filipina?

As the world has evolved I do find some peoples perceptions of the world around them a little strange. I would be the first person to admit I hate Indian call centre’s but it doesn’t mean I hate all Indians for example. I just simply don’t want to be talking to them when I call to get my internet fixed in the UK.

But over the years I have listened to multiple things that come out of peoples mouths and do wonder what is wrong with them? I remember meeting Paul a guy I originally met at a factory. Construction work had been quiet and I took on a temporary job at Rexel the shredding machine manufacturer. Bit of a joke company who had done a cost cutting exercise by getting rid of a lot of people then being forced to hire some back. An example of that was a specific machine that should be in an antique shop but only one person knew how to use it. In fact even the manufacturer didn’t know how to use it as they didn’t have anyone that still could the machine was that old. So a redundancy payment went out and then a request went for him to give his redundancy money back and go back to work. Obviously he settled for keeping his redundancy money and going back to work.

Anyway as we sat in this factory Paul explained to me his life where he had been trying hard to get a full-time job so he could bring his wife from Thailand. At this time I hadn’t even contemplated the idea of meeting someone overseas I was still doing ok with my old partner. But you could see he looked drained, tired and almost teary with the weight that he carried in bringing his wife to his side. To the point I remembered the guys face and later found he worked with another friend years later.

It was on a night out at a pub that a joke was made how he was under the thumb and that he couldn’t get in the pub because he didn’t have a tie. But who was having the joke here? his workmates on a night out or him? here we were all on a night out with there seeming to be me the only guy in a relationship. Everyone else there was single, but more importantly here was Paul going home to a beautiful wife who had cooked him a dinner for arriving home to and here we were going to end up with a kebab after a beer session. Later on I found that Paul had gone from struggling to find a job to owning his own home and him and his wife now owned a restaurant back in Thailand. Who was laughing at who?

As I say its all perception and I do find Filipinos get a raw deal abroad due to the education level and crab mentality that tarnishes the stereotype. You do in the UK at least because I know in the Middle East you ask anyone about Filipinos they do nothing but praise them, be it the quality of the engineering in the oil fields or the administration in the office. The fact is in the UK at least the perception of Filipinos is often poor yet is that just being British? Crab mentality is often pushed as a Filipino thing but I see more Brits bitching and complaining about each other than anyone else. Its more like a dog fight of words and back stabbing. I see only one thing people as people until they prove me otherwise, but why is it people are so quick to run others down in the UK?

I see it even with the I hate  immigrants but I am not racist brigade as they seem to have the dumbest arguments going. As every foreigner they see is obviously a Romanian Gypsy here to fleece the UK for all they can get. They do not see the Filipino care workers by the thousands propping up the UK elderly, they do not see the Indian doctors in every NHS hospital or the Polish dentists they rely on. The jobs that are being taken by foreigners are simply not being filled by enough people from the UK. People would rather do media studies than a degree in physics. Too much of the wrong stuff is being funded by state and yet we are being forced to bring in external labour. Yet we gripe about people that do the jobs we are too lazy to train for? Welcome to Britain.

But it doesn’t mean I hate the UK but simply find it very self serving in many ways without seeing the underlying problem. Nobody looks in the mirror, nobody talks about the fact people have been coming to the UK for centuries, nobody talks about integration being a key problem or the value that people bring to communities. We are awash with negative media that feeds off insecurity and hate. But where does it lead?

As I don’t think people understand their own thoughts as it is so how can I understand their perceptions on others? I find the worst culprits in a more blatant state are Americans but smart Americans seem to understand media manipulation. While unfortunately the mass sheep seem to be content in ignorance and glory fed lies. For me I cannot see the point of arguing the point of how people see others when they cannot see everything in front of them. They cannot see the guy at the train station that blows the whistle to let the train go who originally came from India over 20 years ago. They can’t see the 3rd generation Jamaican British bus driver that gives them a ride home every night. They cannot see the dentist that fixes their fillings or the Iranian heart surgeon that saved their father. If they can only see the Romanian beggar with the Big Issue who knows that they can skim the system as “self employed” what hope do I have of persuading a change in the way they think?